I have recently heard opinions from two influential persons who have said that, (a) to be gay is a free choice; and (b), being gay is a curable condition. What worries me is that they have followers who are impressionable, so I am responding with an opposite view.
Firstly, there is a very good reason why we live in a world so full of organised chaos: it is because life would be unbearably boring for humans if we had no differences to challenge us. Life is also about balance, where beauty is the opposite balance to ugly, and kindness to cruelty, etc, etc, etc.
When a child is born he/she develops with certain attributes. Some will come as a result of the heritage of the parents, such as skin colour, hair texture, eye colouring, perhaps potential height, and sexual perference will also be factored at that time. The gender of the child is not something that can be chosen with any certainty, and normally the child's sexual preference will only develop over time.
I can only speak to the matter from personal experience as a male, which should suffice as this was what the two individuals were speaking about. If we take history into consideration we have lived through a terrible period when young men discovered what the nature of their sexual preference was, and they chose to live in the closet with it because society, in its collective ignorance, rejected that people could be wired in such a way that it was something that was completely out of their power to control. Surely, if it was something that a person could freely choose, would they not choose the path of least resistance?
If being homosexual or lesbian is an aberration to the normal hetrosexual, is it a condition that can be cured? I think you might have better success in changing a person's choice of breakfast cereal than making any difference at all to sexual preference.
I put this question to the two men who have made their controversial statements: Are you absolutely certain that you do not have latent homosexual tendencies? And if you answer is yes, how do you know? There have been cases in the past where men have been hugely outspoken against one thing or another, only to find out later that very person was a practioner of the thing he spoke out against.
I am a 100% hetrosexual! I know this because as a young man I have been challenged on more than one occasion by some bug-eyed, horny man who wanted my body for his pleasure. I have had to fight my way out of situations that I could simply not be a participant to, but the easier option, if it were an option would have been to just say yes. I know my sexuality, and I have the bruises to prove it. Do you?
Here's the point: If you are gay or lesbian, than that's who you are and you must live your live for yourself, not for society as a whole, so long as you do not hurt others. If you are a person who believes in one religion, but you fall in love with someone who is outside your faith, if you follow your heart that is to be expected. If you are a person from one racial group and you fall in love with someone from another group, if you follow your heart that is reasonable and is to be expected. If your personal politics are those of one political party and you fall in love with someone from the opposing party, perhaps you should be pitied, but it would be perfectly acceptable to follow your heart. I have deliberately grouped all of these situations within one section because they are all driven by the same thing: Honesty!
There is nothing to be cured or changed in who as person is, except as the participating persons deem necessary. For you and I, we simply need to mind our own business because our own lives are complicated enough.
Copyright (c) 2015 Eugene Carmichael