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Sunday, July 31, 2011

Bonny, Warm, Scotland!






















Bonny, Warm, Scotland!

Scotland: A Super Civil Society

My wife and I have just done something that on the face of things was not very rational: we left the warmth of Spain to travel to the very last point of the Scottish mainland, John O’Groats, which was very chilly, wet and miserable. There was a method to our madness, and the plane going over was carrying Scots returning from Benidorm, and the
plane that brought us back to Spain was filled with more Scots going to Benidorm.

We travelled to the town of Helmsdale on the East coast of Scotland to visit our son who works there at a hotel. Without that motivation we would not have ever found ourselves at the end of the mainland and we might never have had such a wonderful adventure. Scotland is a very special treat on the eyes, and as proof of that is the sheer number of native Scots people who tour around the Highlands in their motor homes.

Our journey took us from Edinburgh to Tomintoul, that is in the heart of the Cairngorms in the vicinity of Inverness; then on to that town itself. A trip to Loch Ness was in order, although I’m not sure why. There is no Loch Ness monster, and there never has been, although by now they could have built one to make scheduled appearances. Then on to spend the night in a town called Beauly that reminds me of certain Southern towns in America that are home to citizens of a Red Neck persuasion. The landlord of our Bed and Breakfast could not have been more pleasant and hospitable.

The next day we arrived at our destination, The Bridge Hotel in Helmsdale. Our son had only commenced his employment there the week before we arrived. The town is a very small fishing village, and the pace of life is slow. Our son will have to be creative in filling his spare time, but the people with whom he is working are a good group, and the hotel is wonderful.

Although it was getting towards the end of the day we all drove up to John O’ Groats, called the most Northerly point of the mainland. As mentioned it presented unpleasant weather conditions, and I could only wonder what life must be like for the residents of the Shetland and Orkney islands further North in the cold North Sea.

Our trip back down to Edinburgh was via the West Coast. In my opinion this is the best face of Scotland, presenting scenes of such incredible beauty that the mind needs time to fully take it all in. We needed to have stopped and had a picnic while saturating our senses. Even seen from a picture would not be sufficient to adequately tell the tale. There are unlimited lakes and rivers and mountains and valleys and forests and picture-postcard harbours and castles that you might get the impression that this is a grand park created for the tourists by the Scottish tourist Board.

The principal reason why the beauty of it all is so significant is that it is just how Mother Nature made it. If you turn your head away from the road that you are on you will see a kaleidoscope of terrain never ever touched by man. That is pretty special!

In recommending her homeland, a Scottish friend of ours promised that we would find Scots people more friendly than most. When we returned from our holiday I asked her if she meant that we would find some people friendly, or that we would find absolutely everyone, without exception so disposed? It was our experience that we did not find even one person having a bad hair day. How can this be?
I cannot leave this subject without a comment on the weather in Scotland in the Summer. The day we arrived there were thunderous rain showers that caused severe flooding. Throughout our sojourn we had high, freezing winds, dark clouds, the afore-mentioned rain, periods of bright sunshine and sometimes we had all those things in one day. You can only do this type of journey in the Summer. During the Winter snow would make it impossible. Lots of remote villages have snow gates that when closed, effectively shut all residents within the village. I imagine that to be caught on the road in certain areas when a blizzard starts would probably mean certain death.

Last thought: On our journey we came across a place called Nigg, in the county of Aberdeen. As best I can tell, a person would be called a Nigg; or multiple persons are Niggs. To be even more politically correct, they are all simply Aberdonions. (Just a bit of useless information.)

This journey was one of the things on my “Bucket” list that I am now able to cross off, and I am very glad that we had such a sensational experience. I would definitely pay a return visit to Bonny, Warm Scotland.

Copyright © 2011 Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, July 24, 2011

What does it profit a man?



What does it profit a man?
Money, money, money!


The complete question is: “What does it profit a man to gain the whole world if he loses his soul?” I also add, “and if he loses his life.”

I watched a documentary recently about the career of a woman from Colombia named Griselda who ran a drug empire under the name of “The GodMother.” Her former lover and henchman told the story. It was a fascinating account of real life on the streets, and the action that takes place behind the scenes. The main problem is that such a lifestyle is infecting just about every corner of the world.

Allegedly, she ran her empire with brutal violence, supposedly being responsible for numerous murders and terrible injuries.

The possibly attractive part of the story is the quantity of money that changes hands and the lifestyle that that buys a person. The cash is usually held outside banks, sometimes filling a whole room in large bundles. Sellers of drugs on the street have been known to realise sales of $10,000 per day. Men dress themselves in gold chains and dazzling rings and surround themselves with equally dazzling women. All that makes slogging away at a day job with a salary seem like an uphill battle for seemingly silly men.

The reality is that life expectancy is very short indeed in the world of drug dealing. One member of the group might enter into such dealing that could lead to his entire family being killed should he fail.

Tales of torture are hard to bear as “the bizness” seems to bring out the very worst of behaviour. In my own country, which is world known as a paradise, our local lads are involved in an ongoing war to kill one another until the last man who survives will inherit the right to carry on “the bizness.” Even then, he will be challenged by the young wanna-be’s who will want his head.

Normally, when considering working for some company we take into account things like salary and benefits, but if our potential employer suggested that our term of employment with him might be very short because we most probably will be killed, and even tortured before that, we would walk away from the “opportunity”, but in these times of economic crisis people are standing in line to take the place of the previous person who has left his employment, because he’s dead.

Unfortunately, these soldiers are mostly young men who seem to be willing to just taste the good life; to live well, live hard, and die young. So, what is the point? There is no point. If there were some sense in it we would all be doing it. It is all simply madness. These young guys who say they are prepared to die horrible and painful deaths must have some misgivings when the time comes. Being this type of soldier is nothing like defending your country. In that, there is honour, but in pushing drugs there can be no honour at all.

However, let us be clear about this, the source of the problem is the drug user. The drug seller is simply a businessman bringing the product to the market. However, when things go wrong they go very wrong indeed.

This is a business you would be well advised to stay well away from for you gain nothing in the end. You also hurt far too many people to have any claim to dignity.

In Mexico, the present death toll from gang wars is over 40,000 people. Let me spell that out: that’s forty-thousand people. That makes the point most succinctly, I think.

Copyright © 2011 Eugene Carmichael

Friday, July 15, 2011

A Hotel Maid’s Nightmare



A Hotel Maid’s Nightmare - They work too hard to suffer such stress!



Following on from the previous story about a hotel maid’s trouble, I relate here how easy it is for a maid to find herself facing a serious and overwhelming situation.

I was the night manager at the time when a wealthy, high society New York couple checked into the hotel. They spent their first night without incident, but at dinner time the next day they stormed into my office yelling at the top of their voices: “We’ve been robbed!” They went on at great length about the disappearance of a Cartier diamond necklace worth $30,000.

The hotel was accused of not having safes in the rooms. The fact was that valuables, such as this "missing" piece was clearly supposed to be recorded and placed in the hotel’s principal safe. “Your maid has stolen my necklace. Call the police!” I called the general manager who hot-footed it to the hotel, and we called the maid and the police. The maid was a long-term employee, and thankfully a professional who had heard it all before.

This situation took up all our time that night, and in the morning the hotel received a call from a local law firm to advise that they were being retained to represent a big deal New York law firm who were the rich couple’s lawyers. They insisted that the police should charge our maid with theft because the rich and powerful couple were insisting on it. “That woman should be in jail!” That was how they put it. Also, they wanted the lawyers to promptly start a civil lawsuit against the hotel.

The next thing we heard was a call from the Minister of Tourism himself. What are you people doing down there at your hotel? People were sent out from his office to visit with the couple, and everyone was duly concerned. Then the local bloody newspaper got hold of the story, and in short order the New York talk shows ran with the story, with interviews by telephone with the distraught couple. “Bloody bunch of thieves on this island” said the woman. “We’re coming home tomorrow, and good riddance to this island!”

On the fifth day, the local lawyer asked for an urgent meeting with The Minister of Tourism, The Chief of Police, the hotel chambermaid and her lawyer; with the lawyer for the hotel and management, and with media representatives. He said, more or less the following: The couple had returned to their home in New York, and while putting away her other jewellery in their safe she found her “missing” Cartier diamond necklace sitting where she had left it. The lawyer was being instructed to offer to all concerned the profound apologies of the complainants, and in particular their heartfelt concern for the stress they must have caused the maid.

They promised that they would take immediate action to recant to the media, both on island and in New York their previous story, and they suggested that the maid must receive immediate compensation from them. They said that the local law firm was empowered to enter into negotiations to reach a legal settlement with her attorneys.

Within a short period of time that smiling hotel maid retired, having received a confidential, and apparently substantial apology. We had had complaints before about missing things from rooms, and all had been resolved because the items had been found. We even suggested to this lady that perhaps she had not actually brought the item with her in the first place, but that was met with outrage. What impressed me most about this case was that the couple had reversed themselves so publicly. The embarrassment for them must have been tremendous, but they were a very special couple who were highly principled. They were wrong and faced the situation straight on, regardless of the consequences Good on them! To the best of my knowledge, they were not sued by anybody for slander.

In the hotel business “the guest” could be anybody. The next person to check in could be your best, or your worst advertisement.

Copyright © 2011 Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, July 10, 2011

The Dominique Strauss-Kahn case.



The Dominique Strauss-Kahn case.



I hope he is guilty because he has already paid the penalty!

In case you are the only person on the planet who doesn’t know, Mr. Strauss-Kahn is the former head of the International Monetary Fund, (IMF) who now faces charges of sexual assault on a maid from the Sofitel hotel, in New York. He was arrested, handcuffed, charged, and he did the “Perp Walk” in front of the cameras for all to see. He has since resigned his position as head of the IMF, and he may have relinquished his political future as well, that included the possibility of becoming the president of France.

In the minds of many people he was convicted, and all that was to come was the sentence. But wait, now it emerges that his accuser has a serious case of credibility. She lied to the Grand Jury, has allegedly filed tax returns with serious errors, as well as having possible other serious credibility flaws. So serious is this development that Mr. Strauss-Kahn has been released from his bail detention. I suspect that the case against him may have to dropped, but his life is in tatters and his reputation is ruined.

What happened to cause this disaster? We would all certainly like to know the answer to that question. Whatever it was appears to have begun by the maid entering his room. If you have travelled at all and have stayed in hotel rooms, you may have experienced that knock on the door and before you can say: “Do Not Enter!” the maid is in the room. They have seen people undressed, doing all manner of exciting sexual things to one another, and all manner of other things that would make a maid’s diary a best seller.

What, and who is a Hotel Maid:

Ideally, the maid should be invisible. When you arrive she has already prepared your room. She may roll down the bed cover at night and leave you a little chocolate on your pillow. You usually leave a card on the door telling her do not disturb, so there is really no reason for the guest to know who is the maid for his room.

I am a person who has worked in many hotels over a period of more than 25 years, so I have a fairly good idea of what maids do, and don’t do. All maids are drawn from modest backgrounds and are usually interested in making as much money as they can, but I have never known a maid to steal from a guest’s room, or to do sexual favours.

When the maid is in the room the door must be propped open and no other person may enter while she is cleaning except her supervisor. Maids are intensely protective of the guest’s property because if it goes missing the blame automatically falls on her. I have an interesting story to tell about a maid who found herself in very serious trouble, but it requires a column all its own, that will follow this column.

Sometimes, young male travellers will brag about having had sex with the waitress, or the entertainer, or some stranger who was a one-night stand, but I have never heard anyone ever brag about how they did the maid, at least not while they were in the hotel. Like I said, maids are invisible, which is one reason why they can be so aggressive when barging into your room. It’s kind of a statement that says: Do not ignore me!

Something apparently happened in Mr. Strauss-Kahn’s room between himself and the maid. He strongly denies having assaulted or raped the woman. The problem is that if you are a rich and powerful man you probably have made enemies along the way, or if someone wants what you have you are an easy target, simply because you are a man.

As professional men we can cultivate a hard shell and we can be tough as nails in the boardroom, but we have a soft under belly. That is where our small head is, and the way to that is through a beautiful woman, or handsome man, if that is how you swing. So while you are enjoying screwing that person, you may be, in fact screwing yourself.

Hope it was good for you!

Copyright © 2011 Eugene Carmichael

Sunday, July 3, 2011

My Own Private Airforce

















The Greatest Flying Show on Earth

As I have already reported, my Swallows have returned, they have put four eggs in their house that I sublet to them, and the eggs have hatched and the family has grown.

I spend hours just laying back on the terrace and studying the birds in action. We tend to take birds for granted, that is if you live in the country. It’s not enough for us to live in this orange-tree forest, but we are entertained by our own airforce. The more I watch the more I realise that there is method at work. Firstly, this year our own family have a lot more friends who stay with them. Every night they sleep above the window arches, and at first light they wake up the morning with very animated chit chat and songs.

Their typical sentence runs “twitter….twitter…..twitter..soooo loooong” repeated many times over. It is such happy chatter, then they fly off to capture dinner on the wing. During the incubation period one of the parents were always with the nest, then the chicks were born and that started an intense period of feeding.

Finally came the day when the chicks took their first flight. Blanca, our cat was on standby just waiting for the chicks to make a mistake. However, the wonderful thing to see was the support they got from a whole host of visitors. There was so much activity and encouragement as one by one each of the chicks took to the air and made flying look so easy. It was definitely fiesta day at my house.

I am also very impressed by one other thing that cannot be a coincidence. When the weather is not good to hang our clothes on the line we use the lines under the terrace. I have been fearful that the birds will soil the clothing, but it hasn’t happened yet. Given the number of birds flying around and landing where they can, high enough not to get caught by Blanca, their cleanliness is amazing.

I have two neighbours who keep birds in captivity. What a shame, because my own airforce fly high, wide and deep, and when they want to they come back.

Nature is grand, and when we take the time to observe it closely it is truly a wonderful world.

Copyright © 2011 Eugene Carmichael